Just now talked to my mum, calling her need courage.. I can hear my voice shivering when talking to her.. I don't know why..

Telling her I got bf..

what makes me update my blog is, money issue.

Mummy left not much, I think, to spend on me, for my pocket money, yet she still tries hard to satisfy me. I feel so sorry, but what can I do? I think my parents also don't want me to have bread and oat for the rest of my study life.

I think, the most reason that keep me away from home is the financial issue. I feel hard when I see my parents work so hard to feed the family, and I'm just good-for-nothing. They cannot support me any further when I finish foundation. I don't know.

I'm not a greedy and materialistic girl.

But

I need money, I need health.

Sometimes I hate bonding

it just like

I'm a cold person

I seldom care what is happening around me

and the feel of bonding is

warm, sometimes

but

I feel weird and troublesome sometimes

I don't know

(man I'm not talking bout u~)

小时候常听说狼来了的故事

骗久了就会习惯了

我习惯了

你应该知道我对你说的话全都当真

就算有时候被你耍也笑笑带过

算了

我会好好顾好自己

除了我的理想

还有至亲的人

其他的

就take it easy吧

认真只会让自己难受

那又何必呢？

I think

after so many years

so many things I have been through

I don't care who you are

who you used to be in my life

now it's my life

without you

nothing influence on me

I am still the proud girl you knew

I am still proud.

Slowly

I put you down

I live a life

without under your shadow...

突然觉得自己好幸福

当我可以看见你的笑容

只有我才看得见的

专属笑容

^^

就是在说你

笨蛋～

Do I have anyone by my side

whom I can share everything

whom I do not scare of telling anything

who do really care about me

when it comes to this?

It's heavy.

I know I'm gonna be alright.

Again

I'm all alone here.

I will be alright.

It's like

I am too weak to against any virus

what happened to me?

Another lump discover on my body

Am I dying?